• Oliver Messner

Bath Time

Updated: Jul 11, 2019

I still can't believe how much the kids dislike showering or bathing, and when I say dislike, I actually mean hate. The type of hate it usually takes a lot of time to accumulate. Things like bills, mortgage, taxes, the aging process and it's associated pit falls, these make sense and have an obvious trail which can easily be traced back to where and why they engender this feeling. For some nonsensical reason, the girls just cannot understand that being clean is actually not such a bad thing. Not some form of heinous, ongoing torture that grown ups have devised for no other reason than to punish their children.

Kira is fine with the actual washing part of the procedure but never fails to complain about having to do it. She proceeds to come up with reasons as to why she shouldn't have to wash and argues these points vehemently, every single day. This little ritual has become a daily occurrence that I enjoy. She is very creative and the arguments she comes up with never fail to make me laugh. I never fold and she doesn't ever win any of them.... but they still make me laugh.

It really gets interesting when it's time for Mia's bath time. El Demonio has one view on the subject and one view only.... She loathes it to no end. It actually used to be worse than it is now. Not long ago we had to chase her down and then force her, kicking and screaming, into the bath. All the different bath time toys in the tub did nothing to calm her down and were mere tools with which she could vent out her frustrations on the world in general. They were thrown everywhere and at anyone close enough to witness the spectacle of her soapy defeat. She has now gotten to the point where, while defiantly not happy about the entire thing and still prone to a fit every now and then, she accepts it as a necessary evil that just has to be endured.

The biggest problem now is, washing her hair. For the sake of her, and consequently our, sanity we've cut down this activity to about twice a week. She will scream blue murder as soon as water touches her head and continue to do so until the task is done, where the screaming and the tears miraculously stop on command, as if nothing at all just happened. I am constantly expecting the neighbors to call the police, as I find it highly unlikely that no one in a half mile radius cannot hear the commotion. My imagination conjures up the image and accompanying shrieking of someone who has been set on fire and isn't aware of the whole ' Stop. Drop and roll' procedure.

I can't wait for this little phase to be over, as I associate the growth of no less then nine grey hairs to this phenomenon.

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